"I am serious!" Ryan shouted. "I don't just want a Dumpster. I absolutely NEED a Dumpster for Christmas. Every time I see an Imodium commercial I think of my House, clogged with debris. I think of my poor basement, an indoor landfill of two-legged tables, cat-soiled sofas, old TV stands, lopsided bureaus, busted lamps, one-wheeled bicycles, bags of rumpled clothes, old paint cans, cardboard boxes of junk mail. More junk than Afghanistan sells us every year."
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